10 Questions to Ask a Therapist You’re Interested in Working With

Seeking therapy is a brave option. There are certain questions to ask a therapist you’re interested in working with and yourself. These questions ensure you find the right therapist for you. 

There are many things to think about when choosing a therapist to work with. It is essential to ask questions and seek clarity on different aspects of their therapeutic process. You need to ensure you feel safe, cared for, and accepted. 

You also should learn more about a therapist before committing. 

Asking and reflecting on these questions may feel uncomfortable, but they will encourage a bond with your therapist and help you assess your fit. 

Open and honest communication with your therapist is paramount to a successful therapeutic relationship, so ask your questions! 

Below we explore some questions you might consider asking and reflecting. 

1. Does the therapist genuinely care about you and your problems?

This is an important question to reflect on before choosing a therapist. 

After your consultation or first session with the therapist, reflect on whether they did/said things that made you feel cared for. 

Did they pay attention to you when you spoke?

Did they remember what you said earlier in the session, or did they keep forgetting the details you mentioned? 

These things show whether the therapist listens and processes what you say to them. 

When you spoke, did they pay attention to your body language? Did they notice you tense up or see when you teared up? 

If you shed some tears during the session, did the therapist offer you tissues? 

Having a therapist who pays attention to your cues and shows compassion can help you feel more cared for. 

If you feel your therapist genuinely cares about you, opening up about personal life experiences will feel easier. 

You will be able to form a stronger bond with your therapist, which will help you have better outcomes in therapy. 

2. Do you feel understood by the therapist? 

Feeling understood by your therapist is very crucial. 

There are different ways to feel understood by your therapist, so reflect on these factors: Does your therapist use words that show they understand how you feel? 

When they discuss the issues you have shared, do they grasp how extreme of an impact those issues have on you?

Do you feel like they understand what you are going through or at least understand the emotions you are dealing with? 

Consider whether or not you feel validated by this therapist. 

It may be hard to determine what makes you feel validated — it may be more of a gut feeling. So, trust your gut. Do you feel understood and validated by this therapist? Having your therapist understand you can help you feel connected and heard. 

If you commit to a therapist who does not understand you, it will be hard to find common ground and fully trust them. 

You deserve a therapist who understands you and wants to earn your trust! 

3. Is the therapist accepting of your true self? 

Do you feel like you can be authentically around your therapist? 

Feeling accepted for who you are is necessary to feel safe and secure, which is even more important when forming a therapeutic bond. 

Do you feel like there are parts of yourself that you need to hide from your therapist? 

If you feel hesitant to share something about your true self with your therapist, there may be a better therapist. 

The right therapist will be kind to you and accepting of your identity. They will not treat you differently for who you are. 

A therapist who accepts the true you will allow you to open up in therapy completely. 

Without this full acceptance, you may build resentment towards yourself, causing more harm than good. 

4. Can you comfortably reveal personal information to the therapist?

Therapy requires you to open up. 

You will have to share deep, nitty-gritty details of your past to understand how they influence your present behaviours.

Do you feel comfortable opening up to your therapist? 

Do you feel that you can share your traumatic experiences without the therapist treating you differently? 

You should be able to talk about your trauma without the therapist forming a negative opinion of you. 

If you do not feel comfortable opening up fully, you will not be able to experience the full potential for growth and healing that you would feel with total comfort. 

The right therapist will work to ensure you are comfortable, and you deserve to feel safe and secure in therapy! 

5. Do you feel you can be honest and open without fear of judgment?

Honesty and trust are paramount. 

You should be honest with your therapist for the best results. 

And to let you feel safe to be so vulnerable, your therapist should show that they will not judge you for anything. 

A good therapist stays neutral and will not pass judgment on you. 

If you fear judgment from your therapist, you will not be able to fully open up and share details about your past experiences that can help the therapist fully know and support you.

Questioning whether you fear judgment from your therapist ties into a few of our other reflection questions because a lack of judgment from your therapist is so crucial. 

Take the time to reflect on how safe you feel with them. 

Do you feel like you can be honest about who you are, what you have done, and how you feel? Vulnerability can be very challenging for some people. 

Your therapist should create a judgment-free space, so if you fear judgment, you are not with the right therapist. 

6. Is the therapist a licensed mental health professional in this province/territory?

You must make sure that your therapist is licensed provincially. 

These licenses ensure that therapists have a framework and guidelines for practicing. 

They also regulate practitioners and ensure they have a certain amount of training before practicing individually. 

Some licenses involve extra testing, interviewing, or education. 

Licensing regulations vary by province, and for financial/claiming purposes, it may be easiest to work with a therapist inside of your province. 

Provincial licenses require a specific number of years of experience and supervised practice, so check that your practitioner is licensed! 

Ensure that your therapist is registered under their provincial governing association. For example, the College of Psychologists of Ontario for psychologists or the OCSWSSW for social workers. 

Feel free to ask the therapist about their licensing, education, and supervised experience if you would like!

7. How many years of practice does the therapist have? 

If a therapist’s years of experience matters to you, do not hesitate to ask them! 

Typically, the amount of years a therapist has been practicing does not relate to how good they are. 

A recently licensed therapist is not worse than a therapist who has been practicing for years! 

There are benefits to having a newer therapist and one who has been in the industry for a bit longer. It all depends on what you are looking for! 

A newer therapist may have more enthusiasm and energy when treating their clients, as they are less likely to feel burnt out or overwhelmed with clients. 

If there are more specific, heavier issues that you are dealing with and need support for, a therapist who has been practicing for longer may have more chances to support others with that same issue. 

However, the least important factor determining how good a therapist is is their years of experience, but if it is important to you, then ask! 

8. What is the therapist's specialty or area of expertise? 

Does your therapist specialize in anything?

Some practitioners have additional certifications that help them specifically support certain situations, like OCD or anxiety disorder. 

If you are dealing with a specific concern, find a therapist with expertise related to that concern. 

For example, if you are struggling with traits of borderline personality disorder, try to find a therapist who specializes in dialectical behavioural therapy or treating individuals with borderline personality disorder. 

Therapists may also have different training to perform various therapeutic approaches. 

If there is a specific style of therapy you are looking for, then seek out a therapist with those qualifications. 

Some therapists may not have areas of expertise, and that is okay! That does not mean a generalized therapist is worse or less than a specialized one! 

If you do not have a specific issue you want therapy for, then having a generalized therapist may be perfect for you. 

9. What treatments have been effective for similar issues? 

Some styles and approaches of therapy can be more beneficial for specific issues than others. 

If there is a specific treatment that you want to try first because of its effectiveness, seek out a therapist who primarily treats clients in that way. 

You can ask your therapist what approaches they feel most comfortable using. 

Approaches are usually less specific than a specialty. Most therapists know a few different therapeutic approaches. 

You can also talk to your therapist about what treatments or approaches they have seen to be effective for other clients in a similar position as you. 

Knowing what type of treatment, techniques, and approaches are most effective for the issue you are dealing with can help reduce how much time you spend looking for the right therapist. 

10. What insurance does the therapist accept? 

Before committing to a therapist, ask what insurance they accept.

It is essential to know how your therapist handles insurance claims. 

Do you pay in advance and claim later? What details do you need to claim it later? Ask the therapist about the logistical details of working together. 

How much do sessions with them cost? What is their recommended session frequency? Compare the cost and session frequency to your insurance coverage. 

What can you afford? How much money comes out of your pocket? 

You can even ask if tax credits are available for the services from your therapist or social worker! Be sure to sort out the financial details before committing to a therapist. 

Choosing a therapist to work with is a tough process. 

You deserve a therapist that is the right fit for you. 

To find that therapist, you must ask questions and reflect on how they treat you. 

By asking and reflecting on these questions, you can better understand your therapist's style, approach, and technique. 

This understanding can help determine if that therapist matches your needs and preferences.

Prioritize what is important to you, and be sure to ask/reflect on those priorities to find your right fit. To learn more about how to find a therapist who’s right for you, click the link below.